Monday, September 17, 2007

Ashop Commerce

Yes, it's another review! Hoorah!

This time it's about Ashop Commerce, which is a shopping cart software company who provide an easy, usable way for e-retailers to sell their wares. For those in the e-commerce sector, this is a handy alternative to the devil of a checkout, Paypal. Most e-commerce software suffers because it is untrustworthy or just plain difficult to use, however, Ashop Commerce is an award-winning work. They are currently offering a free trial, so if you sell e-merchandise, I would suggest giving it a test. They can even integrate with Paypal if you feel so inclined. They offer a great solution for mid-sized companies who need to be able to compete in the big leagues. If you're looking to get a good ROI for a shopping cart e-commerce software, Ashop Commerce is the way to go.

They've got reasonable pricing, they're a solid company, and, all-in-all, Ashop Commerce is a great solution to your e-commerce needs.

Friday, September 14, 2007

fruit of the loom

Those commercials? With women just parading around in their underwear? A big fan of them, I am not.

Not because I feel they degrade women. Not because they've got men in fruit costumes. None of that.

It doesn't make any sense.

Why would a woman send an apple an apple pie?

That's the equivalent of someone sending someone else a steak. A steak made from humans that is.

Seriously. FOTL, just stop it. Stop with the veiled references to Elton John (Women who are a little obsessed with, ahem, a fruit? Yeah).

That's my take on it.

Friday, August 24, 2007


Well, I'm off to BYU. The posts will be limited to links-a-lot due to New Student Orientation. i get to lead little freshmen around campus. Hoorah.

Wish me luck.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

my beard: a chronicle

my beard

only a little while longer till it's gone.

BYU here I come.

Thursday, August 16, 2007


So, as you may know, my hair has been growing unabated for these last few months. So has my beard. But, as it is almost time for college again (I fly back the 25th, woo woo!), it is also time for the hurrcut.

So, I will be posting pictures of the results. I think that I will have my hair be shorter than my beard, so that my beard looks even longer and more awesome than it does now, if that is, indeed, possible.

I'm really excited for college. I'll be sure to blog there, as I have here in Texas.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Classic Rock Finance

My Finance blog is starting a new series: Classic Rock Finance

What's the first song to be featured? Freebird, of course.

It's awesome.

In other news: I put in my two weeks today.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Smorty, the Paid-to-Blog Service

Advertise on Blogs

I recently decided to put this blog to good use, and after a long and arduous search of the internet, I finally ran across Smorty, a service that's reasonable, easy to use, and safe way to get paid to blog.

Smorty works like most pay-to-post sites: you see offers from companies who want you to review them, and you give your opinions on them, linking back to their site. It advertises itself as, "a bridge between bloggers and advertisers. Advertisers start campaigns with us and we deliver them to the right bloggers for publishing an opinion on their Blogs." I dare say my blog is a wealth of knowledge, and that my opinion is highly regarded among many people.

There are r
equirements for Smorty, some of which my finance blog not meet. I'm not surprised since it hasn't been around for long. The criteria they provide for what blogs must meet include (but is not limited to):

  • Blog must be indexed by Google and Yahoo
  • Blog must be older than 3 months (I think this is why my other blog was rejected, also the page ranks)
  • Blog must not contain any violent, hate related or adult content
  • Blog must be active and have a history of minimum average 2 new posts per week
  • Blog must not have duplicate posts or excessive duplicate content

This idea of "blog advertising" appeals to me. My blogs were reviewed and their status was made known to me within 24 hours, though they say it can take up to 72. The minimum that they pay you is 6$/post, but, they claim that higher google ratings and "Smorty Scores" (mine is 550) can earn you even more (100$/post??!!!??). I'm excited about this advertising opportunity. I also like it because it seems as if it polices the blogs very effectively, and it has a nice, sensible policy.

All I know is I'll have lots more to write about. Don't worry, my blog will still contain all of my heart and soul, its witticisms and eccentricities, colloquialisms and so forth. But now I have posts that will be earning me some money, and as you know, I work hard for the money.

Monday, August 06, 2007

why on earth

Why is it that my cellphone's predictive text always, and I mean always suggests G'd for 413 instead of I'd? I really don't understand. It doesn't make sense, I always correct it to I'd. It learns on other words when I switch them- case in point, i just texted someone and used "meal" twice, and the first time it came out as "neck." I fixed it, and the second time it came out as meal.

But it's never switched to I'd from g'd. I've never even used d'd. I can't even think of a case where I'd want to use g'd.

Why? I love my phone, I love texting, but this one little things frustrates me so much.

Thursday, August 02, 2007


I've read a lot of books this summer

  • Dante's Divine Comedy (about the 7th time through it all)
  • The Master and Margarita
  • A Man For All Seasons
  • Survivor
  • A Fighter's Heart
  • The Dip
  • The 4 Hour Work Week
  • Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
  • The Sound and the Fury
  • Catullus (a book of Greek Poetry)

I really do like reading. Knowledge is power, knowing is half the battle.

Saturday, July 28, 2007


I'm going to be an uncle, again!

I still say this one will also be a boy.

Thursday, July 26, 2007


My parents are the weirdest. They're still convinced I'll marry this girl who I knew back before kindergarten (maybe earlier?) and apparently she's headed out to BYU this fall, so they want me to take her out.


I've got a date for next Wednesday- not weird, in fact, awesome. The girl is way rad, and we're going to go on a picnic. Hoorah.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

knee hurting

I hurt my knee.

It hurts a lot. A lot a lot. But I took 6 advil, so I should be alright.

Good news though, my beard is coming in nicely. I'll put a link to the facebook shared thing sometime soon.

And my back hurts. This sucks.

Work is going fine. I'm working on a big article on random stuff I've thought of. And my review of the Harry Potter book will be up next weekend. Maybe.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

my beard

let me show you it. soon.

my beard.

it's going to be so cool. not like this cool, but I plan on being at least this cool.

you'll see.

Monday, July 16, 2007

i work out a lot

I work out almost every day, and generally that involves riding a stationary bike. I usually ride for about an hour, watching movies in two parts, or watching TV shows, and so forth. I go about 20-23 miles, depending on how high I set the resistance.

I like cycling. I really do. I don't have a bike of my own really, but it makes me comfortable feeling that if I get called to a bike mission I will be able to keep up. Or even a walking mission that I won't get tired as easily. Of course, the word of wisdom-keeping thing will help too.

The only problem I have cycling it that sometimes it hurts my knees, but I've mostly fixed that just on seating position. If you have the seat too low your knees to to high and it hurts. But I figured that out pretty quickly, and so I've corrected for it.

It's weird working out with a semi-beard. I like it though. I've got it for 36 more days. It will be sad when I shave it. I'll post pics soon.

Friday, July 13, 2007

i'm sick of china

I don't have a problem with chinese people, but I seriously think the chinese government needs to be destroyed. they have HUGE issues- overpopulation, devaluing their currency, trying to sue google, giving us poisoned trains, paints, toothpaste, broccoli, sending us cardboard wontons, defective tires, and so much more.

The worst part: I don't think these are accidents, especially the ones that we know aren't (devaluing currency). If these were accidents, I doubt I'd be as bugged. I have a sneaking suspicion they're doing this on purpose- and by government mandate.

but we'll never do anything. they're not like a huge trading partner or the cheapest source of labor we have. or, for that matter, ethical.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

harry potter and the one bad scene in an otherwise great movie

The movie is awesome, except for what I talk about in the last paragraph. Harry Potter is great, but what freaked me out about this movie is how much it made me like Luna Lovegood. She really made a lot of the movie for me; I really liked her character And she was cute, in an odd way. I'm just scared that someone will IMDB her and she'll be like 12 (EDITShe's 15, almost 16, which is at least better than 12)and people will make fun of me, but I can't deny it: she was my favorite character in this movie, and, in my opinion, the best actor next to the guy who does Snape. You have to know he's a great actor for the kind of complicated role he has to play.

I think what really made this movie for me was the flow- it was fast, but done well enough that you didn't get lost like in Prisoner of Azkaban. Of course, Harry and Cho's kiss scene was unnecessarily cheesy, and making Fudge seem like "Big Brother," along with the marginalizing of Kreacher's role were some of the points with which I have contention; nonetheless, the movie is absolutely the best of the Harry Potter movies, which is saying something considering it comes from one of the more baseline books. The book wasn't a Chamber of Secrets, but it was no Half Blood Prince. Anyway, if you haven't seen the movie, don't read this next paragraph.

How could they do Sirius's death like that? I mean, I laughed. Not just me, the entire theatre was laughing. It was comical. I had the image in my head of him falling back into the gate, not being lifted all "crucifixion pose" like upwards. I really am very mad about this one scene almost ruining an otherwise spectacular movie. This is almost as bad as the NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! from Darth Vader. In fact, I am going to directly compare those two scenes: they both sucked. But, Sirius at least sucked in a decent movie, and not a movie that ws already a flaming pile of poo.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

recent music acquisitons

Okay, I went on a little wild the other day looking for new music. You see, I "obtained" a copy of the movie Thelonius Monk: Straight, No Chaser, and I just got a hankering for some jazz. So I went full out and got a copy of Monk In Paris: Live At the Olympia. It's so nice, especially "Epistrophy," which is just so easy to get caught up in and feel the music. I believe this is the first time I've ever used three different formats to indicate pieces of work- italicizing the movie, underlining the album, and putting the song in quotation marks. Anyone know if I got that right? I have a sneaking suspicion I could have underline the movie AND the album, or italicize both. I'm really not sure. Thank goodness for not being an English major.

Also, for my Dad's birthday, my oldest sister (the one with the terribly cute son, my awesome nephew), got my dad three Loudon Wainwright III albums- Album II, Attempted Mustache, and Strange Weirdos (which is the soundtrack for knocked up). I really, really, really like this music. Not only is it funny, well written, perfectly delivered and just a bit wacky, it's the exact music I would create were I a songwriter. The first time I listened to "The Man Who Couldn't Cry" I actually sang about half of the third verse in my head- during the first chorus. It was freaky how much I can predict these songs. Mainly it was awesome, because I've found more music in which I can delight (hah! I love grammar sometimes), and I really love falling asleep to "Grey in LA." Thanks older sister!

In other news: I'm getting ready to switch to typepad. I don't know if I will do it, but I certainly will after the mission. I just get so frustrated with Blogspot's image stuff. It's rather a hassle.


Saturday, July 07, 2007

okay, sorry

I know I'm doing the whole one post/day on each of my blogs, but, I went to San Antonio to pick up my brother. My dad and I went, that is- my mom wouldn't let me drive to San Antonio alone, much less let me go to Paris with my dad. Heaven forbid I go to the greatest city on earth for a week and have the opportunity to be culturally enriched while meeting high profile investment bankers (investment banking, for those of you who don't know, is the career path I am currently investigating). But no... I'm just 18. I can't do stuff on my own because I'm obviously not good enough to do that kind of stuff.

More posts later. I just needed to let off some steam. Hemmingway and Fitzgerald weep for what could have been, but alas, is not.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

happy independence day!

Lets never forget our freedoms, or how much they mean.

Monday, July 02, 2007

topics i think about

Since my work is rather repetitive and formulaic, I am able to just set myself to auto-pilot and think. I've come up with a lot of things to think about, and so I though I'd share them with you. Some of these could go well on my personal finance blog, but don't quite fit.

-Urban finances: Their bank accounts- where they bank, how much they save, spending habits, anything they invest in, and what drives them to act. Also, the effects of advertising to urban culture and buying patterns from that advertising.
-Dilbert: it's scary how close Dilbert can come to my work life. I see it all the time, where I can almost pick out lines to put in thought bubble or word bubble. It gets really scary.
-Pokemon: I'm ashamed to say it, but I've been playing Pokemon Silver a lot lately. I'm to the final four, and will probably destroy everybody. I caught Lugia. It's so addictive.

Yeah, there's more. But I'm tired. Maybe later.

Update: I went through the final four and beat everyone, but lost to the Pokemon Master Lance. His dragon type are too much for me. But, I only had 5 pokemon, and one of them was eevee, who I'm trying to make evolve into umbreon. I'm also trying to catch Raikou, the legendary dog, because the one thing I'm lacking is a strong electric type pokemon, and I don't want to bother with raising one, I'd rather just get on that's already lvl 40. I have a master ball, and I've searched all over. Hopefully I'll catch him today. Soon... soon.

my obsession with moleskine

I have an unhealthy obsession. I cannot deny this. I love moleskine notebooks. I have, currently, three cashiers, a small sketchbook, a small notebook, a large notebook, and a small daily planner for 2007.

I use them constantly. I love taking little notes, drawing random stuff, keeping track of stuff. My most recent pickup was the large notebook- currently blank, but will soon be filled with lots of awesome things. My favorite one is the day planner- it's really thick, but it's saved my life on so many occasions. I can keep track of daily expenses, I can write down people's names who I meet and want to remember.

They're a bit on the expensive side, but I can't help myself. I have few things that I really obsess over, but moleskine notebooks are the exception. Occasionally I like really nice pens, but I buy those a lot less often than the moleskines. I plan to pick up one of the city ones for Paris, for the day when I do go to Paris. Of course I'm not picking it up right now, but whenever I do head to Paris I'm going to pick one up.

Okay, that's all.

Friday, June 29, 2007

ode to a laptop bag

My laptop bag is nice
It really is quite great
If it were an attractive lady
I'd take it on a date
But that's be kinda awkward
If she just held my laptop
People would look at her funny
And I'd ask her to stop
Oh my laptop bag has pockets
It really does have much
I put lots of things in them
Like pens and paper and such
It's even got a bottle holder
And a case for my laptop too
It hold my awesome laptop
Better than other bags do

Thank you.

Monday, June 25, 2007

the reasoning behind impulse

(Note: this post isn't funny)

When a certain action elicits a reaction of an instant nature, we view that as a natural reaction, one that cannot be controlled. But, to do this, we must concede that we lack control over our body as a whole. Indeed this is true, but we have a great amount of control- we can force our heart rate higher by exercising, we can slow it down by sleeping. We can breathe fast or slow, we can blink quickly or go to a certain point without blinking. There is very little we can't control, so why do we cede the natural reactions?

Perhaps the most evident argument is that we cannot control this natural reaction because it is unexpected. I agree, it is unexpected, but I disagree, I say it can be controlled, but not instantly, and not without will power. Impulse, reactions, they are the beast in man- they are things we must overcome because we are, indeed above the beast and unwilling to return to the lows, as said John Stuart Mill. Many say that we live in a society in which everyone is allowed to thrive, but truly they are not- we can easily see the swine, who roll in mud because they know no better; even if they did, they do not understand what better truly is. But we can also see the elegant homo sapiens, those who do because they can, and know that they are on a higher plane from which descending would be truly shameful. They have overcome the beast, they no longer cower at the proverbial lightning, indeed they expect it.

I cannot accept that it's impossible to avoid natural reactions because I know of some I can control. I have total control over my entire being in most situations because I strive to be conscious of myself in relation to everything around me. I could simply lay back and take it, reacting as I wish, letting myself be carried by the whims of nature, but I refuse because I am one of mankind. We have stopped reacting to nature, instead we control it, manipulate it, learn its patterns and use them to our advantage. If we then allow certain aspects of nature to overcome us, we have failed to understand the level to which we must rise.

This is not to say impulse is bad, for in our early years, we all have impulse we have not learned to control ourselves, we have not learned enough to react to every situation as would perhaps do us the most good. But, as we grow and learn, we can string together experiences and learn how to react in a new situation by assimilation of past experiences, a balance of what works in one situation and another based on how this situation by which we are faced compares to those previous situations, this is how we grow. This is how we exceed our expectations. We do not have to rely only on our personal experience, that is why we learn history, is to learn and be able to draw on past experience, not simply to know what happened, but to know what will happen. More importantly, we learn it to know how to stop or react to what will happen, we will know what worked, what failed, we will be better than our predecessors, and our progeny will be yet greater.

I have considered it, and I see impulse as simply the beginning- we start by reactions, we control those reactions, we adapt these actions to new situations and thus we survive. In this wise, we are no better than animals, but we are uniquely capable of creating to solve problems as no animal is. We are able to not just use tools, but use the best tools available, we are able to further our understanding through research and simulation, something animals lack. At the base we do share the learning process with animals, but we are humans because we take this learning process and kick it in to overdrive, going beyond what should be capable. That is how humankind wins. We exceed nature's expectations, and in doing that we can learn to control it, use it, and facilitate it for our own uses.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

i'd like to dedicate this post

To styx's "Come Sail Away" because that's what is playing right now. I've got to be free... free to face the life that's ahead of me. Very inspiring.

My nephew is about the cutest baby in the world, even if he cries more than anything else. He has a lot of squeaks and hiccups and occasionally an almost-giggle, but generally, he's crying. Or about to cry, but this morning he was smiling a lot. he does this funny thing where he just sticks his tongue in and out like a snake- I really don't know why but it's something I haven't seen in any other baby.

It's nice to have him over because I miss playing with babies. The last baby I really got to play with was Emily's niece and that stopped when Emily and I stopped dating, which was one of the big disappointments for me. I know it's like.. four years at least until I might be a dad, but I think I'll do a good job, if only because I'll let my wife take care of all the gross stuff. Hahahaha... yeah, my wife is going to hate me. I actually wrote a letter to my future self (seven years older- that's 25) and I'm giving it to this guy who will mail it to me in seven years and I'll read it. I wrote a lot of funny stuff and left some money and my expired license and BYU ID card. I guess I'll have to get a new one this fall.

Little Bro gets in today, as does G-Ma Mississippi. Exciting stuff. Uncle B and Aunt R came over yesterday, as did cousin J, and we had a nice big lunch of burgers and dawgs and sun chips. Man, I love sun chips. I got a haircut, unfortunately, and went and got groceries for my experiment on my personal finance blog. I'm really satisfied with what I bought, and I'm sure I'll be able to surpass my wildest expectations in terms of how long the groceries last.

Friday, June 22, 2007

being a working man

I remember the days of yester-semester, right when everything started to go right and I felt fulfilled and a bit overwhelmed by everything, but it was okay because I knew and believed in what I was doing. This is kind of how I'm feeling now. I love having a job, though not necessarily the job I'm at, but I don't dislike it. It's good experience, and I'll have contacts to add on my resume now that will be solid contacts. Not that my dad wasn't a solid contact, it's just nice to move beyond the apparent nepotism.

Tomorrow is a full day- helping someone move, getting groceries, taking care of recycling, getting a hair cut, writing enough blogs to make up for lost time and enough that I'll be able to post once every other day and not feel guilty. I kind of plan on switching between this blog and my personal finance blog so that if you go to both, you'll never not hear from me! Except on sundays, I'll use those to write more content and to rest. I feel like I really want to become a full-fledged blogger, unfortunately, in about six months, I will be on a mission with no access to blogger, unable to hold on to my amazing posts. A two year hiatus, highlighted by me coming back and posting ridiculously long stories. I hope I don't turn into that. I want to be this blogger- this blogger intrigues me, because it is me in so many ways, but at the same time it is simply a projection of me, somewhat distorted by the medium and lack of personalization.

My main concern is my gmail account. I have two, and I love the names. I don't want to lose that just because I've been away two years. Though, I might be able to check email- it really depends on the Mission President where I go, though by then, computers might be standard. Maybe missionary blogs will be too- giant blog rings of missionaries sharing stories and tips and, ah who am I kidding. It would be really hard to pull that off. Turns out google will delete my account after 9 months of inactivity. So if I can't use it on the mission, I will have to give my parents the password and make sure they sign in and jiggle the mouse periodically. I really like my emails- d.n.m***** at gmail and dan.theman.m***** at gmail are by far the only addresses I'll ever need, in my opinion, one personal, the other professional. I don't know if I need the asterisks, but I'll take it like I typed, so deal with it.

To be fair, this isn't my main concern, but it's the main concern I want to blog about because it's somewhat relevant to the blog itself. I'm actually more concerned about being financially and mentally and spiritually prepared, but a lot of that is just personal and I'd feel really weird giving that out in a blog. But not so much in real life, with friends, I think it's easier to discuss that kind of stuff. it'd be weird to talk about my gmail accounts with kids I usually hang out with.

Working is nice though. I am really a guy who enjoys work, as weird as that is.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

the sweetest thing

I'm a working man, working 8-5 figuring out everything I need to do, and overall I'm enjoying it. Though, admittedly I am working at Greenspoint which is at times a bit scary, but overall it's not too bad because the office I'm working at has plenty of places for lunch right next to it, and soon I'll probably just bring my own lunch.
The only thing that I could really ask for is my own car, but even that isn't too important because I'm able to ride with my dad or mom. As soon as every who's over goes back home, I'll probably be able to take my mom's car to work. I do love having my sister and nephew over- he's so adorable, everything he does just makes me smile. He's really entranced by lights and fans, and we have plenty of them for him to stare at.
At my work they have these amazing coffee machines- they have built in packets of different kinds of coffee, but also they have hot chocolate and a milky way based hot cocoa. I've come to be addicted to the milky way based cocoa, because it's just so good. I might have to get my own mug, because when the door opens up for you to put these packets in, if your styrofoam cup is too big, it will crush the edge.
I should be getting my new laptop bag by this weekend, which I am super excited about. It's gotten rave reviews at and I'm very impressed with all the technical specs- everyone says it's big enough to hold a lot of stuff, but it never gets too bulky. Sounds like the perfect bag, but I'll be the real judge of that. I'm obsessively tracking it at FedEx because I'm a little too involved in delivery sometimes. But I also love tracking things- watching stock trends, shipping orders, migration patterns, and os much more. There's so many interesting things, mostly I get my maps and trend diagrams from but I just go with whatever my Google Reader is giving me at the time.
I also obsessively read The Consumerist because it intrigues me, but I really want to start reading The Economist because I love economics with an unholy passion and it seems to be the highest quality magazine with the best written articles widely available for a reasonable price. That was a rather long sentence, I cannot deny that, though this one might turn out longer because it is, in fact, an observation of the former, which observation must indeed exceed the observed lest such observation becomes null and is simply a restatement of the previous sentence when in fact the observation must observe the previous sentence as well as itself. I love being intelligent.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

i'm really enjoying my wiki

I've added an FAQ, and dating application, and have fixed some of the formatting issues that existed previously. That page just fits my sense of humor so well- something about it is just so me.

I'm trying to get more people interested in this blog. That and my Echo Boomer Finance blog. I really enjoy blogging, and I wish more people would read them- I've posted facebook listings, I import notes to my facebook, and I just try and get my name out there, in hopes that people will recognize me and like what I say.

I'm going to try and move more towards writing- long articles, reviews, advice (for the finance blog) and so forth, in hopes that moving away from the journal-entry style of my posts will make this blog more... viewable. But I won't be moving completely away, don't fret. I'll still have witty insights and lifetime updates.

Pictures of my nephew to come.

Friday, June 15, 2007

hello people who have stumbled on to my site

First of all, thank you blograters. I love you guys. Hopefully more people will see this site and enjoy my writing. Or, if you're here from my facebook market posting, thank you too!

Now, inter-blaggers, you may be wondering, what does this kid think he's doing, what with all his blogginating and so forth? Well, I like to write. About everything. That's this blogs unifying theme: what interests me. Because I know what's best for me to write about so that when you read it it doesn't suck too much. I've scoured the archives and have chosen a sampling of what I have done. If you just want to read a few, make sure to go to 2, 3, 8 and 12. No, I will not rearrange them, they are in reverse chronological order.

  1. Things that are always funny pt. 1 pt deux
  2. The Cancun Story
  3. I expose Dave Grohl and the guy from Taking Back Sunday as the same person.
  4. My take on the Great RPS Debate. Just a note, I almost won 25,000 for rock paper scissors up at BYU, but lost to a cheater who didn't let his next opponent watch his previous match. And the contest went by the dumb rules, and I was quoted in a local newspaper denouncing the tournament's un-American rules.
  5. One of my longest posts. I had a lot in it, and I really like to read it. Somewhat comical.
  6. Pre and Post Thanksgiving assessments
  7. My Life, at one point
  8. I do more and more posts that are just pictures with comments. I like them. Especially the second one- If nothing else, read that one.
  9. The BYU conundrum
  10. I am calling the last Harry Potter book out.
  11. My 50th post. It' a little introspective, but I really like it because that was a time in my life where I was changing a lot.
  12. Most cocaine in a breakfast cereal.

You can read the rest of the archives, if you wish. There are far more posts than I would have liked that are just a few sentences, but there are a few that are worth reading if you've thoroughly enjoyed any of the posts I've listed. I hope that my blog can provide a source of inspiration, of warmth, and of humor over this summer and upcoming fall.

just by way of inroduction...

my new personal finance blog. won't be as frequently updated as this one:


Thursday, June 14, 2007

a post from the past aka the classics subtitled better than i've ever been

Okay, anyone remember xanga? I found my old one, and I'm not going to give you the address because it's entirely the writings of an extremely hormonal kid who had no clue what he was doing. But I did find a couple pretty good entries which will be filler when I run out of ideas on this blog. So here's one about dentists, enjoy!

I'm beginning to be highly suspicious of dentists. Okay, I am suspicious of anyone who, for a profession, chooses poking people in various body cavities or parts. But, Dentists especially... I mean, I don't think they do anything for anyone that doesn't have bleeding gums (They also have a habit of giving these to people... more on that later), cavities, or general tooth decay. First, at the dentists, you sit in a chair similar to the ones used when experimenting on animals. Not that I'd know.... dang it. Scratch that last part. But, then you get laid back, and a handy assistant comes to talk to you about your life, gives you candy and has a great time! Oh wait, that's a toned down bachelor party. Please excuse me. Really, an assistant comes and talks about stuff, then pokes you in the mouth with a piece of metal. Now, I have a question. If dentists encourage flossing and brushing, why are they poking us in the mouth with metal objects? That just doesn't seem to follow.

Okay, then the lady asks you what flavor you want for the polishing of your teeth. I imagine teeth get dirty very quickly, because I have never seen my teeth shiny. I suppose this is one thing dentists do to confuse people: tell them they are going to polish their teeth, and then people flip when they don't shine, so they go pay for expensive toothbrushes, teeth whiteners, shoe buffers, etc. But yes, then she puts your selected flavor (fun fact: all the flavors are exactly the same. You just think it is caramel apple.) On a whirring equivalent of a shoe polish applier, and proceeds to talk to you, this is rather unintelligent. If you try and talk while you have your mouth open for a long time, you notice that water builds up, and when you try and talk, "gleeking" occurs, generally right into the assistants face (or at least, if you're aiming for it). Even after the first five times, she doesn't get that if she asks you how old you are, she's going to get a faceful of spit. Maybe they've become numb to it. Maybe they're brainwashed in assistant's school.

I love how they make comments about how your teeth look. Why? Because every visit it's the same exact thing. "Well, it looks like you have fillings on your molars." I really couldn't thank her enough for pointing out what is on my little sheet of paper of what goes on at every check up. She then writes that down on my new check up sheet. She notes that the fillings have been worn away, and she'll have to refill. I don't think she got that that was what happened last time, and the time before that. Perhaps you should try something other than wasting my money?

I love the logic... you've got parts of your tooth missing, so we're going to put this non-tooth stuff in your tooth to make up for it. Then, when they put it in, they stick a giant radiation gun right in there just to make sure the sealant will harden. It's really comforting to hear two people discussing whether the twenty second mark is two beeps of the gun or three. I even told them (with violent gleeking) it was two. I mean, it doesn't make sense that it would be three! That's like asking if the penny candy is a quarter. Real comforting. Then, they have the nerve to send in another guy to poke at my teeth. He does it more quickly and professionally, and I wonder; why couldn't they send him in first? Lots less bleeding. Then, they ended with the classic keep brushing. No flossing comment this time though. I guess by not flossing very enthusiastically, I got them to give up. Hah! I win again.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

My Life is Good

So, I've been chilling at home, not particularly happy that my dad has been working at Baker-Hughes, and thus I lose money not being able to work for him. Granted, he's making a lot more money, money which will pay for lots of stuff for me, presumably. This next week he's going out of town, again, I won't be working, and my mom will be at Girls' Camp so I won't even have a car.

This really doesn't matter to me as much as I'm making it seem, I just need to fill blog space really. Soon, I'm going to post pictures of my desk setup, of which I am very proud. Organization is one of my favorite things, even if I only do it sometimes to stave off sleep. Or to help me get to sleep. For me, organization and sleep go hand in hand, which if you look at how I don't make my bed ever, doesn't make a lot of sense. I figure, if I half-heartedly cover my bed with the big blanket (comforter?) and the pillows are on top of it, it's good. Occasionally (re: once every other month) I do make it semi- well. Or at least I did in college, but it was so much easier then- I could easily reach across the bed.

I hate shaving. It's such a dumb taboo that facial hair= denigration. I know, I know, Honor Code, Honor Code, and so long as it remains in there I'll remain clean-shaven. I refused to vote for the BYUSA president, however if one comes along promising to rock the boat and get rid of the facial hair clause, I'm voting for them. Also, I hate tipping. I know it's really nice and everything, but why? Why can't employers do something like... pay a living wage? Not make them rely on tips?

I hate social expectations, or what's the sociological term? Mores. I had to look that up via my Sociology Majoring sister. I learned that term a while ago in Mr. Rice's Sociology class, but I really don't know why. That describes a great deal of the extra-curricular classes in high school. Just another reason to get out a year early like I did.

I wrote something on why I don't vote (YET), and I think maybe I'll post it here sometime soon. Who knows? I have a lot of ideas for posts- Book Reviews, Original Writings, Re-posts from a long time ago, and my computer set-up pictures, of course. Maybe even a list of blogs I've been reading (obsessing over) this past little while. I'm not short of material, just time. And motivation. If you're reading this via facebook, go to my blog link and leave a comment, or leave a comment on my facebook, or something. I just like to know it's not just me reading this.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Only From the U of U

comes Mouse Party. Now I want people to stop using drugs because I'm sick of the ridiculous lengths people go to to demonstrate the effects of drugs. At least there aren't eggs and various plates being smashed. I'd much rather deal with this kind of anti-drug campaign. I mean, when we have to turn to Canada for the War on Drugs.... I just don't know.

Also, I started my own wiki all about me. Well, not really. It's mostly made up, though some parts contain various bits of truth I think. You can visit it at My favorite line is "Most Cocaine in a Breakfast Cereal." I don't know if it's ever been used, but I googled it and apparently no one else has. But it gets me every time. Can you imagine that on a saturday morning cartoon commercial? A drug-riddled mascot for cereal? Well, it's not that different, if you think about that. Tony the Tiger, Captain Crunch, that Cocoa Puff Bird, the Trix Rabbit, and so forth.

Most Cocaine in a Breakfast Cereal.

Thursday, May 31, 2007

I want to be a Sufi

This is a good story.

Read it. Savor it. I know I did. I love little nuances in language. I also love old-world comedy. Reminds me of a story I heard while sitting in on the application interview of a guy for a position in Linguistics. He was telling about his thesis, which was a translation of some Slovakian/Russian/Arabic text into English. It was terribly interesting because the text actually made fun of a lot of translations methods for many things, and in this anecdote it's about this Frenchman's way of translating hieroglyphics. Anyways, here's the story, as far as I can remember. Parenthesis are my comments.

Baron van Lichtenstein (not his real name) was traveling through southern Russia on an expedition. He was a world famous traveler and intellectual. With him came his servant, and together they traversed the Indo-Asiatic plains. One day, while searching for a rare object (not the grail, but something along those lines), the Baron fell into a cave. Inside this cave were thousands of curious markings and the covered everything- from the floor to the ceiling. After the initial shock, the Baron realized: these were hieroglyphs!
"(Servant's name) do you realize what we've uncovered? No one had ever supposed Egyptian influence to pass this far east!" And the Baron went on to translate using the Frenchman's method (I forgot the French guys name. I really need to take notes.)
"Baron, this is an excellent work! You have deciphered the tales of a lost civilization! An entire society of tales beyond that which we have known!"
"Surely this will cement my place in history" said the Baron.
As the Baron and his servant were talking, a local nomad stumbled into the conversation. "Baron! What are you doing here?"
"Why can't you see good man, I have discovered the literature of a lost civilization? These hieroglyphs are remarkable!"
"But Baron, those are not hieroglyphs. Those are the natural markings that appear in every cave around here."

Hahahaha, for some reason I really do find stuff like this funny. I just think it would be even more funny if the guy had translated this story wrong. But he was rather impressive. I hope he gets the job.

I cleaned out the gutters today. It's getting hot in Houston. I have a feeling all this rain and clouds we've had is a thing of the past. Ah well, such is life.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

A First for Me

It's official. I've become a blogger. I found myself at this site and I said, "Oh, I am so blogging this."

Ugh. I feel so dirty.

Anyways, today has been the first day I haven't spent stuck in bed, or coughing, or hopped up on cough medicine, or in the hospital, since last wednesday. I went in with a fever and a headache (what I thought was a bad reaction to an antibiotic) and came out with pneumonia and a headache. As well as three holes in my back. Granted they were small, but they were still holes. One as deep as five inches.

But I got to eat Krystal's right after my hospital experience. So, really, it was worth it. That was last Thursday, so it really hasn't been a whole week, but I was feeling bad last Wednesday when working for my Dad.

I really can't wait to get back out to BYU. I miss it.

Saturday, May 12, 2007


Some of you may know that I studied Latin in High School, and indeed I do enjoy Latin and word roots. I even subscribe to languagehat through Google Reader, and today I ran across this little jewel, not only an interesting article but an interesting name. Circum of course means "around" and according to this article cellion means "guys who hang" though languagehat puts it as "cell" from cella, which makes much more sense. Anyways, this is a fun read about one of the weirdest Christian sects, though, as is almost always the case, probably not the weirdest.

My favorite passage from this article is this one: "Sociologically, the Circumcellions were the Roman equivalent of trailer trash -- rural, uneducated and less-than-notable in terms of contribution to the gross national product. The only job of a Circumcellion was simply "being a Circumcellion." Despite this, members of the sect didn't starve to death... because that would take too long," and I absolutely love the idea that trailer trash pre-dates trailers. Ye Olde Trailore Tryshe? IRE DOMUM QUISQUILIAM? My Latin translation is rusty.

Anyway... That's all.

Monday, April 23, 2007

This is really cool

I have had soooo much fun with this. I like to choose places opposite of eachother and say that the people are opposites. The opposite of a Brazilian? An Indonesian.

Other intriguing opposites:

Colombia/ Thailand
Argentina& Chile/ China
Spain/ New Zealand
Mongolia/ Argentina
Vietnam/ Peru

There are others. I think.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Saturday, April 07, 2007

A Story About Love- ft. Eggs

Okay, I have never painted eggs for easter. But today, my friend Jason invited me to come color some eggs in the girl's hall basement with some girls. So I was all for that- I loved it. I was very creative and made four awesome eggs, who wanted to be in a story, so I took pictures and made a story. Here you go:

There once was an egg named Eggbraham Eggsteinowitz

He had a girlfriend- sunrise.

They decided to take a walk together. Their life was good.

They played and Sunshine saw somene- another egg. But this egg was different.

"What's your name?" asked Sunrise.

"They call me Sunset" said the egg.

Eggbraham and Sunrise noticed that Sunset was... different. He was on his side.

"I know, I'm a freak. Go on.. you two seem to be having lots of fun together. I don't want to ruin it."

"Hey Sunrise, do you know any other eggs that lay on their side?" asked Eggbraham.

"I don't, and Sunset seems so sad." She replied.

"Wait, who is that?" Asked Eggbraham, looking sightly to Sunrise's left.

"Hi. My name is Hyphy. I see that you're on your side too. What's your name?" The new egg asked Sunset.

"My name is Sunset and... would you like to take a walk with me?"

"I'd love to. Let's go" sid Hyphy.

They made small talk and Eggbraham and Sunrise waved goodbye.

"They look good together" remarked Sunrise.

"Stop trying to compare our relationship to every other egg you see. You're smothering me" replied Eggbraham. But he added a "JK' so they both laughed.

"So, what's your sign?" asked Sunset.

"We're eggs. How would we know anything about astrology?" Hyphy replied.

Sunset laughed nervously.

"Hyphy?" said Sunset.

"Yes, Sunset?" she replied.

"Hyphy, I haven't known you for very long, but... you're the most beautiful egg I've ever met." He stammered.

"Oh Sunset, no other egg has ever said that about me!" She fluttered.

"That's because usually eggs can't talk." He smirked.

They fell in love. It was a happy relationship.

"Isn't that nice?" asked Sunrise.

"Stupid side laying eggs! They should go back up the bum they were born from, if you asked me" replied Eggbraham.

"Eggbraham, I didn't know you were Egg-cist!" Sunrise cried in horror.

"No, I'm sorry, it's how my dad was raised. In the South on a cotton plantation. He was the plantation owner's favorite egg." He explained.

"Well then I guess I can forgive you, but you have to change." She said.

"I will change. I will change for you, my Love" and Sunrise knew he wasn't lying.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Some... Kinda Weird News and Normal News

Okay, first the kinda weird news. About... two years ago, I dated this girl, we'll call her Kara, we met at EFY, kept it up for a while, she went to BYU-I, we kept in touch, then eventually we broke up, a couple weeks later she was engaged, got married a year ago-ish. That's cool, right? It was a good relationship- she was a wonderful girl and we had some excellent memories (that was the year I did stand up at EFY- oh man did people love that), and I was happy for her when she got married. There's a funny story about that, maybe I'll share it with you some other time. But anyways, I just recently talked to her, lemme see if I have a copy of our conversation... oh yeah, here we go:

me: (Kara)?
her: Dan?
me: wow. it's been.... forever
her: yeah it has
her: hows it goin!?
me: how are you?
me: It's going alright. I'm almost done with my second semester at BYU
her: w00t
her: nice
her: im good. very pregnant lol
her: whats your major?
me: i just changed it to management w/ an emphasis in finance
me: wait.... you're pregnant?
me: oh wow

So yeah, she's pregnant. And I dated her, so now a girl I dated is going to have her kid (his name is Maximus) in 5 weeks. I'm very... happy? But it's such a surreal realization, especially since my oldest sister who is somewhat older than Kara, and they're both having their first kid within a month and a half of eachother. This is all a bit much for me to take in. Can anyone bring some perspective to this that perhaps I'm completely blind to?

Life is good, school's wrapping up and I'm all wrapped up in school. I'm seeing all of my guy friends get their calls- I'm excited for them. Four are getting them in the next couple of days, and I am just thinking... I've got a couple months until I even put in my papers! I know it's crazy but I'm already really excited. I'm applying to be a Y-Group Leader for next fall. Wish me luck on that- it's be way fun, but I doubt they'll take me since I'm still pre-mish.

I'm working on getting work for this summer. There's so much I can do I honestly don't know when it's going to go off or what exactly I'm going to end up doing. I just know that I want to visit my nephew, work, work-out, and go to this rifle/ handgun school with my dad and brother.

It's a long, strange road ahead, and I think I'm just beginning to see where it's going.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Obligatory Conference Post

So, I took tons of notes for General Conference. This was the first time I didn't sleep through an entire session- I felt really good about that. I went to SLC for the Saturday afternoon session. I was in the Conference Center, and unfortunately we had no idea that it would be broadcast from the Tabernacle. Don't get me wrong, I loved every moment of the session- remembering is good to do, especially of such an historical building. Unfortunately we had balcony seats and watched it all on one of three giant screens (or one of five or six really small ones, if you squinted), and overall had a terrible time parking. Seriously- it took us an hour to park, for very many reasons.

So, my highlights from each session:
Saturday Morning

Richard G. Scott
- Answers will come a piece at a time so that as we grow we're able to understand more. I really liked this- it made a lot of sense to me, because I'm always growing, and I know that I'm not able to get the whole answer each time I ask.
-If you're prepared, living righteously and living in trust, don't worry about not getting an answer- it means the Lord trusts the decision you will make. Again, something I enjoyed hearing- I often don't get an answer to my prayers, but I don't get a stupor of thought. I had always wondered exactly what it meant, at least for me and this is the big answer for me.

Jeffrey R. Holland
-I really enjoyed this talk and it spoke deeply to me. I enjoyed it because I'm very interested in the words we use, and he had a great quote from the Apocrypha, "The strike of the whip maketh marks in the flesh, but the stroke of the tongue breaketh bone." I've always been a little bit (a lot) critical of people, and I often don't think about what I say. Also, his advice to not whine was very appropriate for the afternoon session switcheroo.

Saturday Afternoon

-I didn't actually take notes. I wasn't very comfortable. But I'll re-read when the Ensig comes out. Lots of stuff about music and remembering though, as I recall.

Priesthood Session

I'll write on this later.

Sunday Morning

-Okay, I'm not gonna lie. I took sparse notes and napped several times during this. I'm sorry, but I did like Neil L. Andersen's "It's true, isn't it" talk, and Gordon B. Hinckley's sobering words.

Sunday Afternoon

Henry B. Eyring
- 'Someday' can be dangerous.
- Prove yourself to the Lord.
- Complacency is not good. Great story about the older GA who wanted to go with him on his trip.
- Your circumstances may not change, but the Lord can improve you in your circumstances.

Dieter F. Ucthdorf
- There is not a point of no return, though that is what Satan would have us believe.
- Wow, I have a lot more notes on his talk. But really that's all that I'm gonna share.

Overall, this was a great conference- the big 177. Six months ago, I was hmmm.. I don't remember. But that weekend I went and ate at a Greek fast food restauraunt with Emily. It was good stuff. Hope everyone else enjoyed their conference weekend. Off to bed!

Monday, March 26, 2007

beatnik poem

Oh, Muses! Forgive me
I have found one for whom
You can provide no words
Yet I need thy guidance
For my tongue is weak
Though no words suffice
My love can, put it into words
The eyes are the body's cavas
upon which every emotion
is written and seen
one stroke at a time
the golden gates are open wide
come find out
no need to run
opportunity is in love
and love is in life
muses, forsake my mind not
Love for a new future
Dreams ended the hopeful past

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Post #54 (I'm sick of creative titles)

Wow. Last night was the DT Invitational. I went with Erica Newell. It was amazing beyong expression.


Wednesday, March 21, 2007


I didn't sleep sunday night. Here's an excerpt of what I wrote:

Insomnia has hit me like a ton of bricks and I hate this so much all I can do is look at myself and think that I'm going to give up on trying to sleep for a long time.
I'm sick. Sinuses are clogged up or something- I really don't know because I've never had sinus problems before. Could this be sinuses? Probably. I can't blow my nose or even sniff right.

So Sunday night was not fun. What was even less fun was Monday morning, where I apparently took a math test, of which I have no recollection. But, I got a perfect score, so that's pretty awesome. The rest of the day was a blur- I saw a friend from back home who was visiting but thought he was a hallucination. I found out later through another friend that he wasn't a hallucination, and I saw him again yesterday and apologized for whatever behavior I displayed.

I'm better now though, so cool.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

A Poem I've Been reading several times a day

Bullfight critics ranked in rows
Crowd the enormous plaza full
But only one is there who knows
And he's the man that fights the bull

I will fight the bull.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

I Had a Dream...

This is pretty significant. I don't often have dreams, and the ones I do have I only remember a few bits and pieces and I try and fill out the details. For example, I somewhat recall a dream where I was hiding under a counter in a bowling alley because the FBI had come in and for some reason were shooting at the bowlers (here's where it gets hazy, and I'll put what I seem to remember in parentheses) because of... (marshmallows) but no one wanted to give up their (marshmallows) because (we were anti-fluorescent lighting. I swear that what I can recall.) So the FBI (blew up the bowling alley) but everybody lived because (we were wearing our anti-bomb belts.)

I hope no one ever tries to analyze my dreams. Except maybe the one from last night- it began with me in an interrogation-style room, sitting in a cold chair. There was the whole one light hanging from a chain, one door, table in front of me, looked straight out of a good cop/bad cop scene. So, the door opens, and in walks (I'm going to say walks because it really moved like a walk) a cube. It's red and yellow and green. No particular order- just those colors, it comes in, walks around me, and then stops in front of the table, which is in front of me. The colors start going randomly, just racing across the faces of the cube, and then they stop, spell hello, and the cube disappears. No poof, just gone. The door opens again, this time in walks a stick man. Exactly like what it sounds- a head with a line for a body, and lines for arms and legs. He comes in, circles me, shakes his head dissaprovingly (he didn't have a face, but it was almost certainly dissaprovingly), turns sideways and disappears. You know how sometimes in your dreams you hear yourself talk? I heard myself think- "What is going on?" There came a third, and final visitor, a skeleton, who, like the cube and stick figure, walked around me, and then stood in front of me. He mouthed (if that's possible for a skeleton- but I could understand) the word goodbye, and then was gone. I stood up, fell on my knees, and screamed "Why?" After that, I stood up, walked out the door and woke up.

When I woke up, I wrote this down, and the entire time I was shaking. This was a really weird dream.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Something is Changing

Okay, so... I'm unsure how to put this, but there have been some HUGE changes I've made in the past couple days- dealing with almost everything in my life. And they're definitely changes for the better. I've become more involved in things I care about, partially thanks to Lexi (who, by the way, is actually cooler in real life than she is online, as hard as that is to believe), and partially thanks to me being more aware of what I really care about. I'm afraid though, I've started routines, I've lost a bit of my spontaneity that i enjoy so much- I actually have a set time to wake up for every day. So long waking up early MWF and late TTH, hello regular sleep cycles... I'm excited, but at the same time, I don't want to lose what has become such a part of me.

I've come back to reading a lot. A lot more than a lot, really, and just anything I can. I've bee reading bits of the Qur'an, the Book of Mormon and Doctrine and Covenenants in Arabic, anything I can find in Arabic, and I'm reading Hugh Nibley's biography by his son, On the Road by Jack Kerouac, Fight Club, and you get the idea, I'm readin a lot all the time. Right now, I've got Approaching Zion open and in between writing this, texting Iggy and reading that, I'm getting confused. But, I'm enjoying it because it doesn't feel like downtime. I like downtime when I plan it, when i'm craving it, but otherwise, I've got such a passion for doing things- anything- that downtime feels like waste. I'm scared that the downtime could be used to be making myself better and I want to be the absolute best.

I know why I've been changing too, it all boils down to one thing, maybe one person, that I can't describe adequately on this blog. I've changed from what I was a year ago, heck... I've been in this change since college started but it's really just come on strong this past week-ish.

Thanks for reading.

*Edit* This is my 50th post. Also, it's the longest, and best, blog I've kept. *Edit*

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

School and Stuff

Okay, school is getting to be relatively normal again after a slew of tests and papers. My sleeping habits are still a bit out of whack, but not terribly so. My Math Modelling class is getting weirder and weirder. We're trying to develop an algorithm, based on probability, for the show Deal or No Deal. I plan on basing my algorithm solely on the probability of Howie Mandel going on a murderous rampage. Scarily enough, the odds are one in five.

My Biology class is amazing. I love my teacher, he teaches so passionately and knows so much random information. We go out on these great tangents, and he's got so many good anecdotes and he has done so much great stuff, e.g. he helped write my ninth grade biology textbook. But what I love about his class is that it does so much more than just teach biology- I had to go back to the original works of Millikan and Rutherford. That stuff was difficult to understand but then I had to quote them appropriately in my paper.

My Book of Mormon class is crazy- my teacher is insanely intelligent, knows so much about languages and the Book of Mormon, and has truly taught me how to study the scriptures. There are little things that I'm figuring out and it's cool because when I read them and notice them on my own, it just adds so much for me to everything that I do. After all, the only reason I do it is because I believe the scriptures and I try and do all that believing the scriptures requires of me.

My Arabic class is really difficult. We speak no english, in 101. All the other 101 sections get grammar in english, but we have to get everything in Arabic. Admittedly, this is my hardest class, but it'salso my favorite class- it just seems so right to learn how to speak it. It's a beautiful language and, I'm learning more and more, a beautiful culture and religion. I've got my own copy of The Holy Qur'an with english translation and footnotes. Reading it sheds a lot of light on stuff I thought was weird but now I kinda get- not just about Islam, but about a lot of stuff. There are deep truths to be learned in many places, I have no doubt of this.

So that's my school update. I will soon (read:in a couple weeks) put up the entry about Classical Art and its Objectification of Women: How Hip-Hop doesn't really Objectify Women and Paula Zahn Needs to Stick to Reporting News and Not Making Issues About her Personal Tastes in Music.

I might need a catchier title.

Monday, February 26, 2007

What Happened to Jamestown?

I occasionally see links to and i enjoy the less-odd site, but these two are worth looking at. I nearly died laughing from the "technologically superior but morally corrupt" bit. True laughter.

Married To The Sea


Married To The Sea

Posts soon to come:
-Why classic art objectifies women
-School stuff updating
-Part one of my seven part series on this book of poetry by Jack kerouac that i really want.
-I need to go to target

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

BYU Confusion

Okay, so I was in my Math Modelling class early yesterday, and it was myself and two other guys talking about Valentine's day. It came into conversation some confusion that we had all experienced, and there were two specific situations that we discussed.

First situation- You see an extremely pretty girl and you're just checking her out, enjoying the view, and, in a few cases maybe approaching her and talking her up seeing what's going on. But, after a few seconds, you realize- she's pushing a stroller. With two kids. This is possibly the biggest dissapointment ever, however it can be matched and exceeded by the second case which was discussed.

Second situation- You see a very pretty girl- just her head, perhaps legs, but you miss the torso. She turns a corner and you get the full view- she's pregnant. How does this happen? I really don't get it. Like, you'd think pregnant women would look a little bit pregnant. I mean, my oldest sister doesn't look very pregnant when you just see her head. It really is confusing- I would guess it's a children of Mormons things, I dunno.

We discussed both of these at some length, and then pointed out that it was something like an optical illusion. I think that was the best way to describe it at least. But the point is- girls get married early. And then they confuse younger guys.

Right now I'm in the commons room on our floor. For some reason my room's internet jack is messed up. So I came in here. there's a conversation going on about early morning seminary- it's quite fun. I miss High school a little bit but not terribly so, but I've gotten over it for the most part. I'm excited about next semester- when all my the guys from Houston get here and it's gonna be kickin.

Okay, time for sleep.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Urgent Announcement

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is going to blow. This book is going to be the biggest letdown in all of publishing history. It will leave us more questions than it answers, and it will be a terrible end to the series. But you know what? J.K. Rowling knows this. I know this, and now you, by reading this know this. Don't understand? As Stephven Colbert would say, "Don't worry baby birds. I'll feed you."

Reasons why it will be terrible

1. It ends what has been a great series. Just ending the series is going to take it down ten notches. No one wants to see this end, especially the people who make the movies and print the books. But, it will end, and we will all hate it. Maybe not out loud, but inside we will wish Harry had gone to Wizarding Graduate School. And brought Hermoine. But left Ron.

2. There's so much anticipation for this book, there's no way it can live up to the hype. It's got too much to answer (spoiler alert)- What's up with Snape? What's Harry gonna do now? Is he finally going to find love/ be a man/figure out everything? Will Ron please die? What is the seventh thingy for Voldemort? More stuff about Harry's Scar, more stuff about everybody and everything- literally every answer we have has to be answered in this book, or someone will complain, guaranteed.

3. She's running out of things to do. She's richer than the Queen. Do you think her money feeds some kind of innovation oven in her head? Nope. She had a great last book, doing the best thing no one thought would happen, but now she's got no where to go. I'll give you a hint though: Harry doesn't die. Everybody is expecting it, which means, they're trying to predict her so they say, "Well then she won't kill him if we're expecting it, but if we're expecting that then..." and so on. But here's the news: he's not going to die. Why do I say this? Simply because that would be the worst way to end this series, and this isn't one of those eastern European films where the main guy dies and it's cool. She's writing for Americans and Americanized UK kids. They're not used to the important people dying, and killing Harry would put out any possibility for a movie version.

4. Even if it's not terrible, it won't be progressively better. Look at the difference between Order of the Phoenix and Half-blood Prince. There's no way we can get another great leap like that. No way in the world.

Now, I'd love for J.K. to prove me wrong. And if I am, I'll gladly eat my words. You can print them out and I'll eat the paper they're on. But, with my low standards, it'll be even better for me if it is good, or less terrible if it is (as it will most likely be) terrible.

Monday, January 29, 2007


School is getting crazy. I've got two papers to write soon, plus Arabic every night and then I have to read for all of my classes and so I needed a little break and I thought, hey why not write a blog entry? I am usually pretty good at doing those, and it relieves stress because I get stuff off my back that otherwise I might not be able to.

Anyways, I'm now making money off this blog. Now, I am not saying you should click those ads. That would be wrong for me to selfishly promote myself like that, and according to the Terms of Service, I cannot, so I will not.

I was reading through my blog archives and I stumbled upon an idea I had once, and I quote, "Automatic pants sound cool, but I doubt I'd wear them." I stand by that statement, it's one of the few things I've ever said that I believe should be universally accepted and so here we are.

I bought a copy of The Doctrine and Covenants/ The Pearl of Great Price in Arabic for my Arabic class. It's really hard to read, but all I need now is a copy of the Book of Mormon in Arabic, and a Quran in Arabic with English translation and footnotes preferably. Learning it is hard but I think I'm getting along okay.

I'm being ordained an elder soon. I'm really excited about it, to tell the truth, because I've been waiting for a while. I sometimes love having graduated early because I'm young and I'm getting this stuff done early, but sometimes I hate it because I'm young and everyone else is older. But it's never terrible, thank goodness. I don't have a roommate, but my floor is pretty cool.

I've sent my dad my resume for whatever job I'll be working this summer- well, not whatever job, I'll be interning with Deutsch bank with any luck, but it's where I'll be interning. Probably Houston, but there is a chance I'll be in London, and hopefully wherever I work, I will have the chance to go to the Middle East and use my Arabic language skills. We'll just have to wait and see- I'll be updating this blog more often as I get the chance, and who knows, this many become a regular thing.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Really Practical Things That Should Be Invented

-White shoes that don't scuff. Coming from Houston, mud could be a problem, and I looked forward to the mudless, snowy walks I could take and not worry about my "ice creams." Well, as it turns out, Utah holds a most vicious evil in its snow- that dirty snow that gets your shoes scuffed to where you can't wipe it off. Examples? I have two pairs of shoes- both prominently feature white, both scuffed with dirty, dirty snow.

First, the Converses

See how normal they look? Well look closer. I've circled in red the most prominent scuffs and dirt for the less discerning readers.

And now, the Adidas.

A nice overhead shot. Nothing too suspicious, except upon closer examination

I realize some of you at this time may be left in need of serious help to deal with these shocking images. Snow isn't quite as clean as it seems.

This post was originally going to contain a lot more, but I had to find a decent photo editor, take the pictures, upload them, etc etc. So here are a few more ideas:

-Shorts that don't rip. I've noticed a lot of my shorts rip weirdly. Other guys have had this same problem.
-Carmex that has the same effects but doesn't make everything seem terrible because of the- and I use this word loosely- flavor.
-Better places for me to put this apple sticker. I had two, and one went on my external hard drive. I'm all out of ideas.
-A cheaper Bluetooth mouse for my computer- Apple's is $70, and I’m in college. I may get it. It's a big debate between what I want, and what I really badly want.
-Machine based bench presses that don't stink. My max according to the one I did was 202- which is about my workout weight. Granted, I do an 85% workout, but still, getting 85% of your max as your max is sad.
-A simpler way to learn Arabic. There's so much I want to do without learning the words for big (kibiir) and small (sugayarr).
-Well, it's not an invention so much as a return to the original formula for Redline- this new one (in the non-metal cans) isn't quite up to snuff.

And now I'm off to go buy some drinks. No wait, I've got water. Yay water. This water bottle, by the way, in addition to being stylish and awesome, was cheap and has already paid for itself when compared to smart water, Fiji water, and all that stuff I used to drink and will, on occasion, indulge myself in.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

stuff people need to listen to, read or know

-Mos Def
-Talib Kweli
-Fort Minor
-John Legend
(Okay, I know those are all hip-hop/rap-ish, but they're powerful)
-The Warsaw Pact
-The Psychedelic Furs
-Urge Overkill

-The Dharma Bums
-On the Road
-Approaching Zion
-Fight Club

-Dave Matthews Band sucks.
-So do Creed, Alterbridge, Jars of Clay, Nickelback, Hoobastank, Fallout Boy, and too many more to list
-Jack kerouac is an amazing writer
-You are not

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Semester Dos

So here I am. I'm taking arabic (ahlan wasahlan). I love everything.

I'm reading a lot. Don't be surprised if I come out of this semester smarter than anyone.